Sgt. Major's Corner

Sergeant “Major’s” Corner

According to Rotary International, “the function of the Sergeant-of-Arms is to help maintain an orderly, dignified, and effective Rotary club meeting, one that will make a right kind of impression on club visitors and guests”.

Well…in our Club we can’t always guarantee that the meetings will be “orderly” or dignified, and for that matter what type of impression we will leave on our guests, but we can say that thanks to our own Sergeant “Major”-of-Arms they will be recognized and thoroughly entertained! In addition to his perfunctory duties of announcing guests and make-ups, Mike Dubbs brings us the gift of laughter through his stories.

Here is a transcript of the past Seargeant’s weekly address to the Southern Pines Rotary Club:

Ladies and gentleman, boys and girls, children of all ages: Welcome to another exciting episode of the Rotary Club of Southern Pines — Brought to you live, and in color, from the beautiful and bucolic resort and country club of Mid Pines; located as is wholly appropriate, on the corners of Highways 1 and 2 of the great state of North Carolina, the Old North State, whose borders reach from the antediluvian shores of the Atlantic Ocean to the oldest mountains in the world!

And across that great state, spread out like the spokes of the Rotary Wheel itself, from Murphy to Manteo, Wilmington to Wataga, Asheville to the Albermarle Sound, are 100 counties, each of them serviced by Rotarians who choose to come together in the spirit of service and fellowship. An honor it is indeed to be of service in any of these counties, but we are fortunate to come here together in THIS county, that has so much going for her – dedicated public servants, outstanding business people, unparalleled quality of life, and the finest young people you will find anywhere – that they could only name her …. [Club yells] MOORE!!!

And if that weren’t enough, Mr./Mrs./Ms. President, and goodness knows it ought to be — we are here on a Friday at week’s end, blessings abundant surrounding us everywhere, a Carolina blue sky somewhere above no matter what the weather — that it’s just GOT to be a heck of a day in Southern Pines!

(Note: Improvisation, addendum, substitution, and embellishment are highly likely in any iteration, and indeed, may be required under the by-laws.)